Have You Ever Just Known?

A funny thing happened this morning... well, yesterday morning with how late it is now. I was in the middle of chatting back and forth with my sister when I started to get this overwhelming feeling that Josh and I might be getting ready to move.

I asked Josh to call when he could, and when he was able, he had barely gotten out his hello before I asked him what the chances were that we were going to be moving to this certain un-named place.

And I quote: "Actually, I just got a job offer there."

What!?

Oh, how I think it's funny how (and why) God works. Why give me a feeling that our family is about to be uprooted at basically the same moment Josh receives a job offer to the very location I'm expecting? It had not even been in any of our conversations any days or weeks prior.

Well, I don't know. Mainly I just wrote this post so that I would have a memory of this funny thing happening.

But let me leave you with something Biblical and uplifting anyway- here is my latest memory verse, I just love it:

"Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed."

1 Corinthians 15:51-52

No matter where we're at in this world, when the Lord calls us home, we will have no other desire than to answer that call and finally meet him up there in the sky. It will be soon, friends. So let him see us busy about his Father's work.

Feed Fat Frankie

Frankie

I’ve made fun of my mom’s poor, ugly, fat wiener dog for years, but I’ve decided I don’t get to make fun of him anymore for being fat. And maybe while I’m at it, I should make my dogs a little fatter too.

 As I was listening to my Bible the other day I heard how this idea of making our dogs fat with people food is actually Biblical. Jesus is our model, right?

I love the story in Matthew 15, and it’s also a painful one to read: Jesus is walking along when this Canaanite woman comes up to him and begs him to heal her demon-possessed daughter. Jesus ignores her until finally his disciples beg him to send her away. Instead of sending her away, Jesus tells her that he was sent to help the people of Israel (not her). He tells her that it isn’t right to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs (like her). She pleads with Jesus one more time, “Yes, Lord, but even the dogs feed on the crumbs which fall from their master’s table.”

She’s right. And Jesus healed her daughter because of this faith.

It’s humbling to realize and remember that I am a dog. Jesus was not sent to this earth for me. I was last in line to receive a crumb from the master’s table.

And how sad for the children of Israel. They were offered a feast from the Lord prepared especially for them. But they rejected this Bread of Life. They broke Jesus’ heart by refusing his gift of salvation.

And so what was left over because of the children’s rejection? More than a crumb. A whole feast has been left over and is available to the dogs: you and me.

It’s not fair, and it’s not deserved: this gift of salvation that was never meant for me. The people of Israel are still the Lord’s first love, and he longs to gather them together as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but they are not willing (Matthew 23:37).

“Did they stumble and fall beyond recovery? Not at all! Rather, because of their transgression, salvation has come to the Gentiles…” (Romans 9:11)

So we are offered the gift of salvation because it was rejected by the Israelites. Here is a warning, lest we become too arrogant about our position with the Lord:

“…do not consider yourself to be superior to those other branches. If you do, consider this: You do not support the root, but the root supports you. You will say then, 'Branches were broken off so that I could be grafted in.' Granted. But they were broken off because of unbelief, and you stand by faith. Do not be arrogant, but tremble. For if God did not spare the natural branches, he will not spare you either.” (Romans 11:18-20)

Before the Israelites rejected Jesus, Jesus was only willing to give the Gentiles a crumb. But now we are offered the same feast that the Israelites were meant to have.

So in trying to be like Jesus, do we offer our little fat wiener dogs our feasts or our crumbs? Which act displays the most love? Well, I guess to be like Christ we need to feed our children first and only leave the crumbs for our pets… but if one of those little one, two, or three year olds of mine refuse to eat that jambalaya I slaved over, it’s going straight to the dogs!

Why Do Bad Things Happen To Good People?

This is an older post that I found in my archives that I never finished and posted, so tonight I'm going to dust it off and polish it up for your reading pleasure, enjoy:



My heart feels sad for our little Jonah. Today I watched him writhe and scream as one vile after another of blood was taken from his tiny little arm- seven all together. When he was through, he was absolutely drenched with sweat. These were the first of fifteen tests ordered for our little guy today... and we were promised more to come.

"Consider it pure joy my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

James 1:2-4

This verse has been the source of much comfort for me in the past, but tonight, I don't want it. How is this trial a testing of my faith?

And anyway, I don't want to consider it pure joy. I don't feel any joy, I can't make myself. I am glad that the Lord believes Josh and I are worthy to undergo this trial, but sometimes I'd like to learn lessons without the consequences of actually having to learn.

Wouldn't that be nice?

Wouldn't it be nice if we were humbled by God but didn't have to face any long-term grief because of our lessons?

And wouldn't it be nice if every bad thing in our life was put there solely to teach us a lesson anyway? I used to believe that. Small, naive little girl that I was. (I think this belief used to drive my mom insane!)

The only thing I can think of right now is that Bible verse about discipline:

"For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and punishes each one he accepts as his child." 

(Hebrews 12:16)

Well, I don't know if watching my son go through an illness or battling one myself, watching my children or spouse die, or feeling the pains of starvation... or whatever trial you might want to insert here... would be considered a discipline. Trials? Sure. But are these trials we all face really how we are disciplined? I don't think so.

When my son is disciplined, it is painful for him. His little hot-stuff, puffed-up pride is injured and he is grounded back to reality.

And as much as I'd like to, I just don't think that that kind of discipline is the same thing as him watching his beloved dog die in his arms while he has no idea why. (No, this hasn't happened in real life- yet.)

So what purpose does watching your dog die serve when you are three? What purpose does watching your son/spouse/father die serve when you are old? Why do bad things happen to good people?

Because they test our faith.

"But he knows where I am going. And when he tests me, I will come out as pure as gold."

Job 23:10

"So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold--though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world." 

1 Peter 1:6-7

If you are a believer in Christ, you are not being disciplined when something bad happens in your life. You are not being punished for some wrong you know you've done, forgot you've done, or think you must have done sometime way back when. You are precious to our Lord and Savior. More precious than gold, and for some reason he has chosen YOU to purify and refine.

So somehow through your tears and questions and anger I urge you to give thanks. Give thanks to that God who is outside our time and knows the end before our beginning. Give thanks that He has found you worthy, and try hard not to ask why. Our minds cannot understand God's why.

Separation of Church and State

There are some political activists, who so often believe in a completely different set of worldviews than I do. They like to talk about a separation of the church and state. These lobbyists use this phrase to crush any form of Christianity that might possibly have a positive impact on the citizens of this once-fine nation.

Islam? “Now that should be allowed in school,” they say. Somehow they manage to mandate prayer rooms and designate times so Muslim children can be allowed to practice their religion during school. To deny them this right would be impeding on their religious freedoms… But, of course, at the same time, Christian prayer has been banned from school in any form. Some Christian children are even being told they cannot say a prayer of thanksgiving before they eat their lunches…

So I’d like to weigh in on this whole separation of church and state issue.

I agree with those activists who “cheerlead” this separation of the church and state. I simply cannot wait until this separation has finally been achieved!

One day our glorious Lord will appear in the sky with the sound of a trumpet, and those who are dead and those who are alive who have loved the Lord and accepted his saving sacrifice on their behalf, those people will be removed from this earth. And what will be left but the complete and utter separation of the church and state?

So here is my request to all of you champions who want to get the church out of your schools, out of your businesses, and out of your lives: Let us go about our work of the Lord. As soon as our work is through, and not a second longer, our Lord will remove us from your sight.

To Those Warriors

 About a month ago I met a woman, Nancy, who I got paired with at a MOPs leadership meeting so that we could pray together. She gave me her prayer requests and I gave her mine in that normal, matter-of-fact way that I have about myself. I was not looking for sympathy, pity, or anything of that nature. I was just answering the question at hand. Boy was I was surprised when she started crying because of the things I was asking her to pray for. She said her heart was weighted and overwhelmed with sadness for my situation with our son.

Nancy started out a complete stranger to me that day, but she also prayed for me that day, and she continued to contact me often to keep telling me that she was praying for our Jonah.

One month later I got to seek her out to tell her that our Jonah had been healed.

I am grateful for all of the prayer warriors out there who lifted up the name of my son when I was too discouraged, resigned, and dutiful to do so for myself.

To Nancy: (Matthew 9:36) who chose to be Christ's hands, feet, and voice to a stranger.

To my mother: (Proverbs 31:29) who prayed our Jonah through the miraculous healings from Fish Odour Syndrome, an inability to drink even the smallest drops of water, and an inability to smile because his misery was so great, even while he slept.

To the elders of our church: (James 5:14-16) who laid hands on Jonah, prayed for him, and anointed him, Josh, and myself with oil.

To Bob: (1 Corinthians 12:7-11) who came out to our house just to lay hands on Jonah and pray for his miraculous healing.

To Ed and Vi: (James 5:16b) who prayed for our Jonah everyday and also engaged members of their church in prayer for his healing.

To the members of my mother's church: (1 Thessalonians 5:25) who lifted our son's name to the Lord.

And to anyone else who told me they would pray with more than hollow words:

I thank you.

Our son has been miraculously healed, and it has been because of your prayers.

I did not have the right faith. I did not have the right prayer. (Romans 8:26-27) Never once did I feel as if I deserved God to take this trial away from my life, but because of you he has.

I can see no greater representation of the church here on earth than your great faithfulness.

Again, I thank you. 

Disabled Children

I think sometimes our bodies tell us we're stressed when we don't even realize we are. Me? I get sores in my mouth. I've had as many as seven at one time. Painful sores. They hang around for a week or two. Not much helps them go away.

Today I have four.

I live a good, blessed life. What do I have to be anxious about?

These are words I repeat to prevent myself from overreacting to situations I'd rather not be a part of. 

This week a lady told me I had a disabled child. This was news to me... And then someone else told me I had two disabled children. Same week.

Stop.

I don't.

I don't want to.

It would be easier if my children were visibly disabled, right? Down Syndrome is a disability that everyone can see. Accommodations are made for these children without words ever having to be exchanged. There is an understanding among other mothers and their children: this child is different and this mother is doing the best she can.

I didn't have time to feel angry about my boys needing braces. It was life and still is life. We have gone weekly then monthly to physical therapy for the last 20 months. Well, cheers. Here's to another two years, as the weekly visits resumed this month with Son Number 2.

 

 

The pictures and videos are sad for me to look back on. But the joy is there too: when he took his first steps ever at 22 months of age, just seconds after receiving his first set of braces. He hated them. But he could walk.

And so now it's business as usual with Jonah. No problem...

But, my baby.

What else is wrong with my baby? 

To all those mothers who look at their disabled child and don't know how to fix them: I am sorry for you. I am saddened with you. I stand by you in that crowded room as we hold our babies high for someone to notice, for anyone to care. 

Who will help our babies in this world?

If we get a diagnosis, what if it doesn't help? What if there is no cure? What if our child will forever have to be accommodated for? How will he survive the humiliation? How will we survive the deprivation of what was supposed to be normal in our lives?

.....

When you have the answers, let me know.

"For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'Do not fear; I will help you.'"

Isaiah 41:13

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take."

Proverbs 3:5-6

"The Lord hears his people when they call to him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time."

Psalm 34:17-19

"So be truly glad. There is a wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. it is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world."

1 Peter 1:6-7

No More, America

There once was a king, Manasseh, who did evil in the sight of the Lord (2 Kings 21). He built alters for Baal and made an Asherah pole. He worshiped all the hosts of heaven and served them. He burned his son as an offering and consulted fortune tellers, omens, mediums, and spiritualists. Not only did he participate in this evil, but he led the nation of Israel to participate in all his sin. Israel sinned more than any other nation before her because of Manasseh’s poor leadership. The Lord’s anger burned because of Israel and Manasseh.

In his anger the Lord said that because of the abominations Manasseh and Israel had committed he would bring such disaster on the nation that every ear who heard of it would tingle. He said that he would even forsake the remnant of his heritage and give them into the hand of their enemies to become prey and spoil to them.

…….

A couple of years later a very good king began ruling in Jerusalem, King Josiah (2 Kings 22). King Josiah started ruling when he was eight years old; he restored the forgotten Law of the Lord and rid the land of all the idols Manasseh had erected. There was no king before him or after him who turned to the Lord with all of his heart, soul, and might according to the Law of Moses (2 Kings 23:25).

Bear with me…

Even though King Josiah turned to the Lord with all of his heart, soul, and might, and even though the whole nation of Israel turned again to serve the Lord, God did not turn away from his burning anger and planned wrath against Israel that Manasseh had provoked in him years earlier. The Lord still planned to destroy Israel.

…….

So how can we relate this story to our lives today?

In America, the majority of people do not serve carved idols. We don’t bow down to them or offer sacrifices: child or monetary. We don’t even know what an Asherah pole is.

But I believe what America has done is worse. We have not been deceived into worshiping heavenly hosts or images that we believe are gods. No, we worship ourselves.

Our children are not sacrificed on an alter to satisfy a statue’s desires. No, our children are sacrificed in our bellies to satisfy our own. We do not lay down the first fruits of our labor- our money, our food, our gifts of any kind- at the feet of an idol in some sort of temple. Our first fruits are spent on ourselves. And we certainly don’t waste our money to build high places of worship for the heavenly hosts; no, we live in mansions (compared to the rest of the world) filled with stuff, always wanting more, bigger, better. The lusts of these foreign gods of these ancient nations are manifest in our own lives today.

And this is not a new phenomenon. It is, and always has been, the American dream.

Even if a president rose who restored this nation into a God-fearing, Bible following, perfect society, I believe it is too late for America to be saved. The detestable abominations we have done in the Lord’s sight, I believe, are too evil not to be punished.

I look at these old nations in the Bible and at the Israelites… at least they were serving false gods. At least they were serving something they perceived to be bigger than their selves.

But, not us. Not Americans. We are our own gods… and after all, wasn’t that the reason for Satan’s fall in the first place? Didn’t he consider himself an equal with God? The Lord made redemption available to fallen men who were tricked into believing a lie. He did not provide an avenue of restoration for the spirits who declared their selves to be god. It is the ultimate rebellion.

America, what are you doing?

It is a grave sin, and I am afraid for your future.